Have you ever ridden a water craft that required paddling on your part to move? Have you ever lost your paddle? Maybe dropped it just out of arms reach on a calm and quiet lake? Out by yourself with no one in sight? It's not fear or anxiety that ensues. I could easily slip into the water and retrieve my paddle. Instead I kneel down. Sit on my knees. Look at the paddle. Study the movement of it and the water. It's coming back to me. But in that moment I feel in control of nothing. That space between commanding my ship and being woefully unmoored without a paddle. And, oh yes, I stop and look around at the verdant beauty of the lake. But I sigh while trying so hard to disguise it as a contented deep breath. I know it's a sigh. The lake knows its a sigh.
That's what it feels like when my girls go back to school at the end of summer. One started 9th grade last week. The other started 6th today.
-dana
Love it! I so understand that feeling. I find myself in that kind of space with the girls getting older. What are we going to do with ourselves? :)
ReplyDeleteYes. It comes at some little milestones and the big ones. Sitting up to crawling to walking steadily, learning to talk and then forming words, toddler speech improving to normal speech...going to school.
ReplyDeleteIt's going to be alright. Try to enjoy each new milestone as it comes. This doesn't end when they leave home you still have so many life adventures to share with your girls. Proms, college, marriage, motherhood and so much more. It all goes so fast so hang onto each new memory :0).
ReplyDeleteHope you all have an excellent school year!
I find myself in that situation also, and with kiddos going into the same grades. Deep breath! Or keep calm and paddle on...lol
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post, such a good illustration. My kiddos are starting week 3 of 1st and 2nd grade today. I pray that as the years go on and they get older that the paddle will never stray out of reach and will always find it's way home! xo
ReplyDeleteFeeling it too. Today is day 2 of sixth grade and I'm sitting at home, not sure what to do with myself!
ReplyDeleteI feel sad that those days are over for me with my girls.
ReplyDeleteI remember cryibg when they went to Kindergarden. And when they left for college. sigh.... I guess we just have to adapt with each new change.
Hi, I just want to say that you are looking mind blowing thanks for the sharing and just keep up the good work.
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I know those days well and to be honest each time my sons - grown men now, make major changes in their life I still sigh....hoping praying for the best for them....
ReplyDeletePS When I seen this pic I had to laugh as the day before I had been out paddleboarding or should say Trying to paddleboard lol!
I saved this in my feedly account till I had time to get back to it because your words spoke to me so much. What a great description of exactly how it feels. Hope you have found your way and are contented again. I find each year I have to find a little bit different of a path as my kids grow and as I do too. But, that's how it's supposed to be, right?
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