It looks like this right now. My girls busy with things. And friends. And stuff. Razor busy with things and stuff. Me too. I'm busy with things and stuff. And still we sit down at the kitchen table every night for dinner together. Every night. Because it's what we do and what, I think, keeps us centered. It's where I hear about what happened at soccer practice and Razor hears about what happened at school. It's where we remind each other of tomorrow's dentist appointment. Or that cat food needs to be added to the grocery list. Or that burping isn't polite at the dinner table but is still hilariously funny even to the grumpiest one there.
At ages 15 and almost 13, the girls have active social calendars. Which is good. And exhausting. Sometimes we say no but usually we say yes.
The busy-ness of it all has been building. And I try to stay in the present. Try to be right here, right now and not worry/plan/think/dwell on what comes next. I don't always succeed but I try. I look out the window and see my kids when they don't know I'm watching. When did she get so tall that she can jump and reach the limb? When did she become such an animated story teller among friends? Well, lookie there, they can discuss something and work it out by themselves.
I know a lesson is trying to reveal itself to me. I've felt it just out of reach for months. I've tried to sit down and write about it. But I don't know what it is yet. It's wrapped up in the busy-ness. It's why I'm struggling to find a regular blogging routine. It's why I'm trying to figure out what my plan is after writing a book. My kids are busy and filling there time with more of the world. It's okay for me to be filling my time with more too.
Clarity will come.
Until then, there is dinner around the kitchen table. I can always count on that.
-dana
Beautifully written post! Takes me back to when my kids were growing up and I so looked forward to dinner for that very reason...hang on to that!
ReplyDeleteExpressed so well.
ReplyDeleteIt is that bittersweet time when they become more independent in their lives, a joy to see but always with a bit of sadness around the edges because they don't need you in the same way.
Mine are now 35 and 26 and I am happy to get calls for advice, help, or just a listening ear. Know they will always need you, just in different ways.
What a beautiful post! My own daughter is now 18 and has taken charge of her education (after I homeschooled her the last 18 years!) Your reflections in this post blessed my heart...for we always connect as well at the dinner table.
ReplyDeleteDinner together every night! Good for you! That is so important. When my kids (24, 20 and 18 and 1). were all still at home we ate together every night and then jobs and sports and activities sometimes interfered, but not as often as you'd think. It's better to eat dinner at 8:00 or 8:30 then not together and if one had to eat at a different time I made sure they never ate alone, always sat with them. And according to my kids we were kind of the odd ones for doing so. Any way don't sweat the changing times, you know your relationship will only get better, knowing when to step in and when to let go is a learning process on your part and on theirs when to ask for help and when to be independent. You got this girl!
ReplyDeleteEvery time I read your blog, I am touched by your words, they are full of emotion, you are able to convey your feelings so well via print. Perhaps more writing is on the cards for you.
ReplyDeleteYou have a beautiful way of expressing yourself and making sure your priorities are in order. Family first is so important because your girls are learning so much from you. Love reading your thoughts as you watch your beautiful girls blossom. You, my friend, are on the right track! Keep loving them and feeding them those awesome pies!
ReplyDeleteWhat everyone else above me said. I love reading your posts. They are so beautifully written. As the mom of three grown girls (28, 30, 35)I understand what you are feeling, as I have been there. The older I get, the more I reflect back on that happy, full, often chaotic time of my life, and wish I could have it back again. I didn't do as good a job as you, as I did not make the dinner table a priority like you have. But I'm proud that my daughter with children is doing that; it's very important. Thanks for your post--it touches my heart-- angela (elmcreekquilts)
ReplyDeleteWe spend more time at the dinner table trying to get the kids to actually eat their dinner so we can move on to other things.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed this post.
I love these posts about your girls and your life. As everyone else has said - well written. It warms my heart to get a glimpse into the world you have going on there.
ReplyDeleteSome of the best families start with dinner around the table yours is a class act
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