Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Changing plans and how I don't do so well with that


Undertaking a big project.  That we knew would mean a shift in our day-to-day for awhile.  That my mind works on whether my hands are or not.  My kids, ages 13 and 11, can do so much for themselves.  And do.  But I still have that plus this.

Taking on more makes me doubt my ability to mother well.  My patience level suffers.  And when momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.  So my big project affects them negatively.

The alarm clock beeped yesterday morning.  I laid in bed thinking of all the to-dos.  Planning out my day.  As the four of us busied ourselves with getting ready, the telephone answering machine flashed.  I pushed play and heard there was a two hour delay to the start of school.  Normally we rejoice and fall back into bed.  Instead I felt agitated.  Mad that another day would pass without me being able to accomplish all that I needed to do.  Deep ujjayi breath.

Then I remembered the family with the newest of newborns.  Exhausted from the birth.  Overcome with emotion for the new baby and the stress that moves in like a tidal wave too.  They need the ujjayi breath . . . not me.

I got this.


-dana

P.S.  A special thank you to my Aunt Sue for making these wash cloths.  They make the constant cooking and cleaning up task of motherhood much more beautiful.  Gah.  Cook.  Clean up.  Cook.  Clean up.  Cook. Clean up . . .

13 comments:

Kar said...

Right there with you girl!!! Change is not a friend of mine sometimes. Especially when you could have slept a little bit longer if only notice was given the night before. :)

Kim said...

I hear you, moving is bringing me plenty of those moments. Trying to sell a house in this market.....not so fun either, if one more deal falls though I'm gonna scream. As for today I am going to go get my hair done to brighten my spirits. Then back to packing, this time next month I'll be moving into my new home :0).
Give me strength!

Happy Sewing, deep breaths and we'll get through it all

Andrea said...

Change in routine is always rough. Hang in there. And don't downplay your stress - it's what you are feeling. Yes, others are going through tough times too, but your stress affects you too. Hang in there....

Sara said...

That mantra about cooking and cleaning is sooooo painfully true:( I love those wash cloths. I made one and it shrunk terribly,but I still use it cuz I made it!

**nicke... said...

xoxo. i feel ya! xoxo

Lee D said...

Mothers all over the world have the same mantra. It changes a bit from year to year. As your kids get older they fend more and more for themselves. I am in between with a 20yr back at home; loves the home cooked meals but does his own laundry. An 18yr old off at school; very independent and 13.5 yr.,,, still needs me, but can bake great cup cakes. some days I do feel like a robot, cook, clean, laundry... but then I go sew and feel better. Don't forget 'ME TIME" its very important.

Kristen said...

Ahh, change. Comes along and tosses things out at us just to see us squirm and wonder how it will all get done while trying to kick us in the butt at times.

One thing I learned lately. Write on a list I will fail. Then check it off. You can't get it all done in a day and realizing that made me smile. Perfectionism and change don't go hand in hand but can I fail at one thing, yes. :D

Hugs, lady, you're a great mom, talented, and going places one step at a time. Breath, laugh, get a hug or two, and realize it'll get done.

Now have a cup of tea, a slice of pie and know you are wonderful.

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amylouwho said...

oh boy do I know that feeling. And yes, you've got this. And let me know if I can do anything to help. :)

diane said...

Your posts always make me happy.

sallgood said...

Years ago I read the book, Gift from the Sea, by Anne Morrow Lindburgh. I loved it, and a particular line resonated with me... "And when I cannot write a poem, I'll make biscuits and feel just as pleased." It reminded me to find joy in whatever I was doing. Even the busy-why-am-I-doing-all-this times. :D

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