Friday, March 8, 2019

Absence. Explained.

It's a waffling back and forth kind of thing. It's a I-have-time-for this or I-have-time-for-that kind of thing. Sit at a computer (more than I already do) or play with fabric. Or, even as the sun starts to shine more and more each day, play in the dirt.

Waffling, sure. But also 2018 was doozy. My mom dealt with a very serious health issue that began in May of last year. My dad continued to deal with ongoing health issues. It was new ground for our family to have two parents needing such careful attention. I'm a days drive away from them.  Much of this fell on my brother. I love my brother. He's an amazing man. He was there in so many heavy ways. Heavy in the sense that your chest feels compressed and forcing it to move up and down with breath is hard. He has his own wife and daughter and business to tend. Dude. My brother - he's the real deal. 

Posting pretty quilt pictures seems frivolous in depths of heavy family stuff, no?

Plus there's the whole thing of by mentioning the heavy stuff, the attention somehow shifts to me. That feels like misguided and unwarranted attention. Makes me kinda squirmy. I'm more of a heads-down-hands-in-my-jeans-pockets-nothing-to-see-here kinda girl.

My dad passed in early February. Parkinson's took him swiftly at the end but it never owned him, for he was always there. He knows how much I love him. And I certainly know how much he loves me.  He guided me in life and I miss him. And I'm so very glad that he is free of his broken body.

Absence. Explained. And I'm feeling squirmy.

So . . . pretty quilts!



scottylover said...

So sorry to hear about all the issues you have had to deal with and of the loss of your father. Sending prayers and hugs your way.


DebbyMc said...

Love you, Dana. Life is hard. But, oh, so beautiful. Thank you for sharing both sides of yours. Take care, my friend. We're here, always reading. I'm thinking of you and your sweet family. ❤️

CitricSugar said...

I have been absent now for years.... Glad I checked in today so I could tell you that I'm sorry to hear about your dad and that you're loved. Hugs, prayers, and wishing you peace and healing. I'm also sending you a psychic casserole and tray of brownies since I can't drop them off in real life.

I've been knitting my face off as therapy lately. It's 100% okay to play with pretty fabric or yarn and use the creative muse as a way to process and deal. Play away.

Laura said...

My sympathies to you on the passing of your dad. The quilt looks beautiful ... such soothing colors.

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hamoda hmada said...

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Priceclan4 said...

Family always comes first.

May the memories of the years you had with your dad be a soothing balm to your heart.

Jennifer said...

So sorry for your loss, thank you for sharing - both about your dad and the quilts pictures, Sending you healing thoughts.

Chris said...

I’m sending lots of love and hugs. It’s never easy to lose a parent even when you see it coming from a mile away. Thanks for sharing your sorrow with us, I hope we can lessen that burden.

Liz said...

I am so very sorry to hear about your dad. It certainly sounds like you've been having a tough time.

Tricia said...

Dana...I am so sorry to hear of your Dad's passing. I wish I could give you a hug and hear all about him. I can imagine all of the memories that must be flooding in right now. I hope that the sadness is balanced by happiness and laughter. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers and though I'm sure you have a strong network of support, if you ever need an old sister to correspond with, I'm here. Take care, Tricia Sandridge-Hicks

Eli said...

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Osage Bluff Quilter said...

Losing a parent is hard, so dang hard. Take all the time you need.
So sorry for your loss, sending you hugs girl friend.

Jessica Christensen said...

Very pretty quilts. I feel you. I'm sorry for the "heavies" you've been dealing with. BUT - pretty quilts! And pretty flowers from your previous post. ;) <3