Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Motherhood. Not for the weak.

Straight up, motherhood is not for the weak.

As babies, my children needed me. They adored me and truly thought that I hung the moon. As they grew and learned and explored they realized other people existed. And they learned that they can do things by themselves.

And when they got into school . . . whew . . . well, school invites all new things, relationships and challenges. Like when my first daughter started kindergarten and started telling me how her teacher can do this and her teacher can do that. I'm pretty sure that teacher became the official hanger of the moon.





But we've been at this school thing for awhile. After all, that one is in 4th grade now and my youngest is in 1st.

I've long since forgiven the teachers for taking over my lunar responsibility.

But there are other challenges as well. Like when little Billy wants to tease my girls. And they cry. It takes everything I've got to not seek little Billy out at the playground and show him a thing or two.



Or when one doesn't get nominated for the Valentine's Day Sweetheart Court. And the other gets nominated for the second year in a row. The sibling rivalry. The joy. The disappointment.

The teaching of grace.

The teaching of graciousness.




This whole motherhood thing is not easy. I'm giving it all I've got.

And sometimes I'm reminded that giving it all I've got is good enough.




Like when I see my 1st grader has set up her own craft area. With her special things. Made all pretty. And right near mine.

-dana

36 comments:

Mary said...

I really admire your new space. I have to step over things to get to my sewing machine. This makes me think I need to be using more wallspace. Thanks for sharing.

Sabra said...

Yeah, I miss the days when all I had to do was find a park and a popsicle and I was the world's greatest Mom. The school years changed everything, no going back. But somehow I managed to get through with 3 wonderful adults to show for it and THEY LOVE ME. Yay!
That last line was a sneak-er and got me all welled up.

Unknown said...

Dana I am right there with you. My oldest is in her second year of college and I have a Junior in High School and then my baby she is in the 3rd grade. They grow up so super fast. It makes me sad in a way. Your space is awesome and the fact that your daughter set herself up such a cute space next to you is even more awesome. You have done a good job!

Teresa

Elissa said...

dana, i SOOOO needed to hear this today (although i am pretty sure nobody hangs the moon for my kids. they hang their own dang moon and wherever they please, thank you!) AND THAT craft area!!!!! I am DROOLING again! i told you i love the blue, but you had to go and stick in a red chair, didn't you?? red is my favorite "neutral" of all time and you just stuck it with the most fabulous blue and made me all jealous and happy for you at the same time. that window is the BOMB. and, anyway, you give me hope that one day these knuckleheads of mine just MIGHT come around.....

Amy said...

I love the red chair, it's perfect!
Motherhood has been prabably one of the hardest things, but also the most rewarding. You can't appreciate the good things in life without going through the hard things:)

I love your daughters space, so cute!

Unknown said...

love that she set up her own space! motherhood - just as you describe it - and totally worth it :)

Sarah said...

Very sweet Dana...thanks for sharing.

Stephanie said...

What a sweet post. I love your crafting space, looks very efficient. Stop by my blog, I'm giving away a handmade felted bag.

PunkiePie (Jen) said...

blue and red, the next "black and white" combo. Love those two colors together and they look great in your space. Very sweet post about your kids. My Punkie Pie kisses me and tells me she loves me and I'm her best friend. She's only 3. I guess I need to cherish those words a little more and more often. Soon, I will be Evil Mom! LOL.

Denissa said...

How cute, you've taught them well! That saying is so true..the apple doesn't fall far from the tree!
I don't know there must be something in the air this week w/ the whole challenges of motherhood thing, because let me tell ya this week is a CHALLENGE!!!

Judy said...

I just had to comment that this is a very nice post. I have felt this way each time I sent one off to school. Now I have only one left in the house who's in school that "still" needs me...which (lol) is on her terms, but that's okay.
I love your sewing room.

Sam said...

Oh well,
My daughter is in her teenage years and I am the not-so hot mother anymore - up until her friends show up and THEY find me pretty cool (unless they show up at 8h00 in the morning and I am in my PJ.. )
Cheers - we'll go through it.

tara said...

oh man, I never thought about alot of that. I dont have a sister but have 3 girls. I am sad thinking about one of them not being picked over another. I'll do the best I can.
Cool creative area. Have fun all of you.

Tine said...

At my house, school is still to come. They are in daycare, and there are a few little boys that I have an urge to talk to, but I restrain myself!
School scares the ---- out of me!!

I love how your post ended! Thank you for reminding me to notice those things as well :)

Anonymous said...

Yes, let's focus on those sweet little things...like kids who still want to be as near as they can to their mommy. And is that a little Tollipop girl I see above your sewing machine?! I have three of them keeping me company right now in my office!

Sarah Pead said...

Your new space looks great. It just screams "Come be creative!"

Anonymous said...

Dana, your post was so appreciated today. The dynamic of comparison between children--how it wrings my heart and yet how it exists despite my efforts to emphasize our individuality. Grace and graciousness--noted.

Love your creative space.

Artfulife said...

What a beautiful post. You explained the feelings of being a mom so perfectly.

Egghead said...

Well Dana, that is exactly why you have grandchildren. They think you hang not only the moon but the stars and for a lot longer. So you get to do this all over again later but it is a heck of a lot more fun. Enjoy!

kiddlebug said...

Thanks for the smile (and the tear!) You don't know what you are made of until you become a mother. I never thought the job would be so hard and I never felt so fiercely protective in all my life.

Dee said...

So So Beautiful. I loved this post too! sniff. I have two little boys and my oldest is about to start Prep this year. My first to go off to school which I'm sure will bring all new challenges for both of us. Selfishly I feel sad mostly for myself but again excited for him as he is yearning for learning. Such a old man at Five. You new craft area look outstanding too! Love it. D. :=)

Bloggy Mama said...

Beautiful area. Beautiful post. Beautiful kids. Beautiful you.
Thanks, Dana.

The Young Ones said...

Dana, I think your blog is my favorite! You are always so inspiring and thought provoking. You hit the nail on the head with the kids and the craft space. I have little ones and am still their "favorite mama". My craft space is currently in the corner of my kitchen, grr. Small house. Thank you for hanging the moon for all of us out here! :-) Tonya

The Young Ones said...

Oops sorry Dana! I changed my settings to include my email! Have a great day! -Tonya

Pony Girl said...

Her little space is so cute! How fun she might follow in your crafty and talented footsteps!
I had a parent of one of my students, from a few years ago, tell me the most charming thing about her daughter. We had sent the children holiday cards at home during the break. I guess this little preschooler slept with my card under her pillow every night and even told her mom that I was her "real" mommy! ;)

amylouwhosews said...

So true.

Love your new creative space! Love that your daughter has one too.

Soon, Then said...

This is so sweet, Dana!

beachy in the burbs said...

That is so sweet! :)

B said...

Great space she created if it is right by yours. They always learn from the pros.

Stephanie D said...

I only had to mother one, so don't know all you go through with more. She doesn't have a crafty bone in her body--a straight A, dean's list, magna cum laude student become lawyer whose only C in her life was in costuming in college.

But she has a wacky sense of humor, and a love of books, and when we connect in other ways, it's magical and so, so satisfying.

wesleyjeanne said...

Yes, you nailed it. The agony and ecstasy of motherhood. Beautiful post.

Anonymous said...

I totally get the sister/unfair thing and the wanting to smash the bully! You do a fabulous job-and just being around your cutie pies proves it for me!

Your quilting space looks amazing!

Elizabeth Cranmer said...

what a great payday!

Tonya Staab said...

What a beautiful space to work in . I wish mine could look like that. If only you could see mine right now. I barely have room for my computer, let alone my crafting supplies. I think you've inspired me to get organized today.

I'm in the best of both worlds right now. I have a teenager who thinks our neighbor has hung the moon because he's taking him surfing later, but twin toddlers who think I've hung the moon because I've been able to flush their pee away 6 times already this morning. Aaah, it's the small things :)

La Yen said...

This gives me hope for the future. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I am very glad to have found your blog. It is full of heart and magic and honesty. Thank you for sharing all three with us.

Teri