Thursday, May 6, 2010
For many years I was one of those moms. One of those moms that had a bag full of supplies needed for little kids. Snacks, drinks, wipes, toys. And sometimes I was fumbly and it seemed like I had everything with me but the kitchen sink.
Somewhere along the line things changed and I've written before about how I'm not so good with change.
I am no longer that mom. Because I don't need to be. No more little kids. No diaper bag. No snacks. No baby wipes. Or sun hats. Or extra socks carried around like a pack mule.
I no longer have little kids.
I've known this for awhile and have even enjoyed many of the benefits. When we go to the pool I can lounge and read a book. Not chase around wee ones on toddling legs. When we are all at home I can sometimes sew or garden or read. Not be on the entertainment committee 24 hours a day. When we go for a hike I can run and romp and explore. And not be weighed down by a bag of snacks and drinks and band aids.
But sometimes I still want to be that mom. Even though I was clumsy and seemed to leave a trail of supplies in my wake, at least then I knew my role. I knew exactly what was expected of me.
For you see, this one has reached an age where the waters are muddy. When I drop her off at school she scurries out of the van so fast and doesn't look back. She is navigating a world of friends and boys and a need to find her place.
And she is managing it beautifully.
Far, far better than I.
P.S. And she is making her first quilt from a pattern. Made from this kit she got for Christmas.